The end of the Thanksgiving Holiday

Today as we waved goodbye to Tucker, Jamie and the girls and watched them drive away, I reflected on the week and the activities and I felt overwhelmingly grateful for our family.  Even with all the problems, I’m grateful for the journey I’ve experienced and the volumes of learning that has taken place in me in the last 24 years of marriage to Neal.

For years I’ve told myself that a combined family is hard and has unique dynamics that come with it.  (And I know it does add some.)  But as I stood in the garage, thinking about the week,  I recognized that it isn’t a ‘combined’ family that makes it hard, it is a ‘family’.  I’ve watched seven children make an effort (I think mostly for Neal and I) to be a family.  I’ve watched the two older children deal with their differences through the years, and I’ve also experienced and recognize the five younger children have problems with their relationships with each other as well.  Some of their problems with each other are miniscule and some very painful. It isn’t about two older children getting along with five younger children, It’s about people learning to get along with people. I also realized that I don’t have to be responsible for their relationships (good or bad) with each other.  I can’t fix it, I can’t change it and basically I didn’t cause it.  As a mother, I like to think that I can fix everything and that we can have a ‘live happily ever after’ family but that just isn’t realistic. 

I would suggest that we all get on our knees tonight and be thankful and recognize how very blessed our family is and acknowledge where those blessings are coming from.  President Hinckley said, “Don’t be gloomy.  Do not dwell on unkind things.  Stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.  Even if you are not happy, but a smile on your face.  ‘Accentuate the positive.’  Look a little deeper for the good.  Go forward in life with a twinkle in your eye and a smile on your face, with great and strong purpose in your heart.  Love life.”

Thanks Jamie and Tucker for coming the long distance to spend time with us.  For bringing sunlight to my life, for putting a smile on my face and looking a little deeper for the good in me. Thanks, Jamie, for our late night talks, our girls night out and for yours and Tucker’s unconditional love to me!  Drive safely!

P.S.  We got a text from Tucker telling us that as he was going through Provo he was concentrating on the Utah football game and got a ticket for speeding!  Not a happy way to end your vacation in Utah.  Dang!