Part of my talk on forgiveness.

I was assigned the topic of forgiveness by the stake presidency to give in relief society at our ward conferences. It is always interesting to me that often we are assigned a subject that we, ourselves, need or if we are not assigned a subject we will know what we most need to speak on. As I began writing this talk I was amazed at how I was impressed what to write. It was a wonderful reminder to me of the miracle of forgiveness and how we should all be sensitive to others in our family as well as acquaintances. I just want to share part of the talk.

"The commandment to forgive is universal. Ultimately we both must and can forgive all who have trespassed against us, but I do not suggest that forgiveness is always quick or easy. Forgiveness is a change of heart, and sometimes a great deal of healing must take place before forgiveness can occur.

Over the years I have learned two very important things about forgiveness. One, that forgiveness for even the most grievous injuries is possible and two, that it can take a long time. I don’t think we can let other people set timetables for any individual, you yourself know if there is more work to be done.

Consider this wonderful one-sentence letter from a child to God: “Dear God, I am doing the best I can. Frank” I believe that is all God wants. Just progress toward the goal. No one who has felt the sweetness of being forgiven or of forgiving another can possibly want to cling to feelings of resentment one second longer than absolutely necessary, but remember that forgiveness is a gift. It comes through the grace of Christ.

I want to share a personal experience that I had many years ago. I was serving as the Young Women’s President and also as the editor for our monthly ward bulletin. I had also been asked to serve as the assistant Stake Camp Director. One day I walked to the mail box to retrieve the mail. Among the bills, I saw an envelope with my name typed on it. No return address was on the envelope and so I was intrigued about the contents. I quickly opened it. As I read the letter, my heart began to race and I had to sit down. Someone had sent me an anonymous letter accusing me of being to quote “the ward and stake parasite who clings and sucks up to leaders to get callings of importance.” I was devastated. I remember thinking if anyone really knew me they would know that for me to be in the forefront was way out of my desire and comfort zone.

For the next weeks and months that followed, I found myself looking around in every meeting wondering who was judging me. I needed the Lord's help to rid me of these haunting and negative feelings.

Years after that regrettable incident, I harbor no ill feelings for the letter’s author. I know that they simple didn’t know me very well. But the letter taught me that loving others includes striving to understand and be sensitive to them. All of us are individuals with varied life experiences. Some of us marry in this life; others remain single. Some have many children; others have none or few. Some endure divorce. Some pray daily for wayward children. Some struggle with chronic illness or disabilities.

Alma’s counsel to his son Corianton can guide us in our efforts to become more sensitive: “See that you are merciful unto your brethren; deal justly, judge righteously, and do good continually” (Alma 41:14)